Closure for me has come in various forms over the years. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly, but when real closure happens, my world shifts.
In a BIG momentous way.
Last night, after sending a very long and sensitive email to a challenging past love and then writing a scathing tweet about the resident in the White House, my connections to the outside world froze.
My phone stopped connecting. My computer stopped connecting.
No website access, no email, no twitter. Nothing. No apps. And no device was giving me guidance as to what was not working.
My TV worked and I was watching news to see if maybe there was a MASSIVE power outage or something.
My head went to the darkest places.
I rebooted everything – several times. Nothing worked.
At 1 am I was outside trying to see if my phone could get “sky power” to no avail…
When my internet connection went out I was cut off – completely.
I finally went to bed at 1:09 am and prayed it would all be magically fixed in the morning.
So at 7:30 am – I am outside again trying to get service for my phone…and I see a glimmer of hope. I had to walk a bit farther away from my home, but my phone started working. I could get email on my phone again. I could see the sensitive email I had sent had not prompted a response. Not yet, at least. At least I know he got it. I can’t control his response or not.
OK – the internet is working on my phone again and I can get access to twitter. I guess the Russians were not attacking my account last night.
No horrible news that our country had been attacked by Iran or Russia.
The worst of my worst thoughts had been put to rest.
So I walk back inside and my phone no longer had the connection to the internet.
Ok – It is not even 8:00 am on Saturday morning and I have not had coffee and I am so not ready for a full day of NO connections to the outside world.
I put the coffee on to start.
Then I start to trouble shoot the components, one by one.
Within 60 minutes I had resolved the problem.
It came down to a router that must have died after many years of use…
When I took the router out of the mix I was able to restore all my access, with all my devices.
Wow – what a difference when everything works again.
I can email. I can tweet. I can browse the web – from my phone and my computer.
My connections have all been restored.
My old router dying was symbolic of letting go, closure. Closure in a crazy way that is only meaningful to me.
This router was a connection to an old employer, a past life that had let me go some time ago and who let me go two more times in the last week…
Now I can finally let go too. Closure. True closure.
And that email I sent to a past love… That was clarity for me. It was important to me. I can let go of his response, or no response. I said what was important for me to say in the most kind and loving way.
Closure can shift your world – for the better.